I managed to drag myself out of bed for physical therapy this morning. I did not want to get up but I have this thing about making appointments that I schedule. I will generally not miss an appointment for anything unless something happens that totally prevents me from going. Like being in the hospital or car problems.
PT seems to help with the stiffness in my shoulder and neck and even helps with the pain... for a little while. The pain is always there but I think that it is helping to loosen up my muscles that are always so tight from my constant feeling sick and chest pain. The stress of trying to deal with every day being filled with pain is making me tighten up and knotting up all of my muscles. The PT helps relax the muscles for a day or two at least. My arm and shoulder still hurt but not as much.
I went to work for a couple of hours to get a truck out then headed to the grocery store to pick up stuff for Thanksgiving dinner at my sister's. She is letting me use her kitchen so I am buying the food and cooking. I was amazed that it wasn't packed in there.
I was so completely exhausted after the grocery store trip. I got to my sister's with the food and had to have her help carry it in. I had no strength left. My sugar was fine but I felt weak. Kind of like I was going to pass out. I sat for a little while and then headed home to rest.
I have felt pretty bad since I got home. I had one of my episodes of feeling like I was having a SVT and the waves of sharp, stabbing pain in my chest. I felt dizzy/light headed. I have had no appetite today. I have had to force myself to eat just the three meals that I have eaten and I wouldn't really call them "meals". My left arm has been hurting since the chest pain started and it is making it difficult to do anything. I took some heartburn medicine, just in case I was mistaken about what was causing the pain. It hasn't helped at all with the pain. I took some aspirin. It seems to have helped a little but I think it is wearing off now.
The fact that I can't do something as simple as going to the grocery store without being absolutely exhausted from it is so very frustrating. I want to do things. My brain tells me to go wash my car, do laundry, go shopping. I just can't do it.
I generally drag my laundry basket to the washer. Thankfully I can rest while waiting for the washer and dryer.
Washing my car is just about impossible now. I tried. I honestly did. It costs $1.75 to use the car wash bay down the street. I think that gives you 4 minutes. I end up spraying my car down, putting in more quarters, resting, brushing half of the car, putting in more quarters, resting, brushing the rest of the car, putting in more quarters, resting, then rinsing the car. I usually end up sitting in the car for a few minutes before I can pull out. I think that this last time I ended up putting in $5 worth of quarters. I hate using automatic car washes because they don't get the car clean and usually leave a film on it but I don't have the strength to really scrub it anyway.
I get in and out of stores as quickly as I can. I usually end up having to support myself on the cart by the time I get to the cashier, even if I was only in there 15 minutes and have 4 items. If I need to go to multiple stores I have to go to one, go home and rest, then go to the next one. Sometimes I push myself to go to two in a row but I usually end up so exhausted that I sleep the rest of the day.
Last night was a rough night. The pain in my chest just would not go away. I know it was close to 1 AM by the time I finally passed out. I am so afraid that I won't wake up in the morning. The feeling that something is wrong in my chest is beyond scary.
I really need answers for all of these problems. I just don't know how much longer I can keep sane.
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